Lightning and Fire
by Blue Interior
Summary: Ailis MacDonall agreed to visit her best mate Darcy Lewis in Puente Antiguo, but that was before Jane hit the sexiest, most clueless man alive with her van in the middle of nowheresville. And then Darcy tazed him. And now, she's crushing on him. Hard. But what will he say when he finds out she's...peculiar?
1. Chapter 1

**Oh yeah, oh yeah, new story, new story! *dances around***

 **Enjoy, my lovelies!**

* * *

All the madness began the day my best mate called me from Puente Antiguo. I was having a nice, relaxing afternoon with my cat, Cappuccino, in the flat Darcy and I used to share. I had a steaming mug of tea, a bag of Sour Patch Kids, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on DVD.

No pants, no bra, no problems.

Until my phone rang. As soon as I heard 'Single Ladies' by Beyoncé, I knew who it was.

"Darce! How are you?"

"Lissie! Hi!" Darcy Lewis is very loud, if you didn't know, so I had to pull the phone away from my ear.

"Hi Darcy."

"Okay, guess what?"

"What?"

"You totally should come visit this week! I asked Jane and she asked Erik, even though she's in charge, and Erik said it was up to Jane so Jane asked me about you, and I said you were totally the coolest person ever! And then she asked if you were the kind of person to get in the way of her work, and I said 'Heck, no', and then Jane said it was okay if you came and so I asked where you'd be staying, and Jane said you could either stay with us or in a hotel, but you should totally stay with us and yeah."

"Um..." I shook my head, trying to process that overload of information.

"Oh, come on Lis! Pleaseeeeeeee," Darcy begged until it physically hurt to hear her whining.

"Fine, fine! I'll get the next flight out. You're lucky I've got an inheritance to blow." My great-times-a-thousand-aunt or some random relative I'd met like, once, had decided they absolutely adored me and shoveled off their entire life's savings into my bank account when they died.

"YES!" Darcy screamed into the phone. Cappuccino ran for the hills or, rather, my bedroom.

"Listen, Darce, I've got to go, I've got a few friends over and-" She cut me off.

"No you don't, you're watching Ninja Turtles."

"No I'm not."

"You so are."

"So what if I am?"

"You need a social life, Lissie." I squawked in protest.

"I have a social life!"

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do."

"When was the last time you left the apartment?"

"Flat."

"What?"

"It's called a _flat._ "

"No, it's not."

"Yes it is!"

"Not in America!"

I'm in America!"

"Yeah, but you're not _from_ America."

"But...touché."

"That's what I thought."

"But, for the record, I left the flat yesterday."

"For what?"

I didn't say anything.

" _Lissie..."_

"What?"

"What. did. you. leave. the. apartment. for?"

"Um..."

" _Ailis Claire MacDonall, what did you leave the apartment for?"_

I muttered a response.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Candy."

"Oh my god." And with that, Darcy hung up on me. I stared at my phone, mildly offended.

"Rude."

And then, just to spite her, I turned on Ninja Turtles and definitely did _not_ book my ticket.

* * *

Somehow, I found myself packing my bags the next morning. Darcy had been living in New Mexico for a little over a year, but she considered herself an expert on what I should bring. Little did she know, though, I'd traveled most of Europe with my Da right after he'd found out he had cancer, so I knew how to pack.

Actually...no.

Darcy absolutely knew that. She knew everything about me. I zipped open my suitcase, stuffing everything in.

T-shirts, in.

Jeans, in.

Shorts, in.

Panties and bras, in. (stop squirming and face reality)

Bikini, in. (Why a bikini? Oh, please, I know Darcy like the back of my hand)

All that other rubbish like toothpaste and whatnot, in.

Finally, I closed it up and set it at the foot of my bed for the next morning.

I'm coming, Darcy.

* * *

 **A/N: For the record, no, I'm not dead. I didn't fall off the face of the earth. I wasn't kidnapped. I'm just lazy and blocked.**

 **But, hey! Here I am!  
**

 **~Blue**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, guys!**

 **First off, I was absolutely blown away by how many people followed/favorited in the first, like, 20 minutes. Thank you guys so much!**

 **Second off, I don't have anything else to say. I just really like saying 'first off,'.**

* * *

My flight left the airport at some ungodly early hour, so you'll have to forgive me if I don't remember every single detail about the flight. I just know that the extremely large fellow sat next to me snored like a freight engine and I definitely wasn't okay with that.

I hate it when people snore.

But, I made it through without strangling the man.

We landed in Austin, Texas and I had to wait for what seemed like forever for my connecting flight.

Hours of turbulence later, we landed on what the little folks in Puente Antiguo considered an airfield. I stumbled out of the plane, a little discombobulated, but okay for the most part and started looking for Darcy.

"LISSIE!"

It wasn't hard.

"OH MY GOD LISSIE!"

Not at all. I tugged my suitcase a little closer and opened up my arms as Darcy cannoned into me. We held on tight for what seemed like forever, until Darcy pulled away.

"Oh my god, you're actually here!"

"Yeah, love, I'm actually here."

"How was your flight?"

"Which one, dear?"

"There was more than one?"

"Two, in fact. First one significantly worse than the second. Bloke to the right snored like a bear." Darcy laughed and looped an arm around me, herding me towards the parking lot. A large white van sat with the engine still running. Two people earned against the front end: a small woman with mousy brown hair, brown eyes the color of rich river earth, and the straightest eyebrows I'd ever seen, and an older man with a surprising amount of blonde/brown hair and bright blue eyes.

"Is that a rape van?" My best friend snorted so violently, she started coughing.

"Lissie," Darcy gestured to me and then to the two others when she could finally breathe, "This is my boss, Jane Foster, and her partner-in-science-only, Erik Selvig. Erik, Jane, this is my hilarious best friend, Lissie MacDonall."

"Good to meet you. I'm Jane." I shook her hand and smiled.

"Ailis." She smiled back and the older man came up.

"Erik Selvig. We've heard a lot about you."

"Oh, really?" I grinned at Darcy, one eyebrow raised, "Hopefully nothing bad,"

"Oh, no. Nothing too bad." Erik said amiably. "You're not American, are you?" He asked, referring to my thick brogue.

"Ah, no. I'm Scottish." He grinned.

"That's fascinating! My cousin lived in Scotland for a while. Where about are you from?" I shifted my purse to my other arm.

"I'm from Skara Brae. But, er," I glanced at the truck, "Can I put my things away?"

"Oh! Sure! So sorry," Jane fussed as she opened the door to let me shove in my bags. "Listen, Ailis, we're headed out into the desert to go check out a convergence. Would you like to come?" Automatically, I felt bed for wanting to stay back.

"Oh, mercy, I'd love to, really I would, but flying drains me. Is it too much trouble to let me stay back?" The scientists looked at each other, looked at me, looked back at each other, then looked at me.

"No problem at all." Erik decided. "Hop in." He swung the driver's door open and we all piled in.

* * *

A short while later, we pulled up to Jane's laboratory. She spun around in the passenger seat to look at me. "Ailis, I'm sorry, but the only place around here that you can stay is the lab. There's a pullout couch in the back room, a kitchen, and a full bath. You'll be okay, right?"

This woman looked so genuinely sorry that I had to sleep in her office that I had to say yes. Even if I wasn't okay with it, I still would have said yes.

"Jane, where I grew up, we didn't have but a wee café and maybe a pub or two, but those were only for the tourists. Da and I lived so far from the village, people forgot we were out there until we came into town." I gave her a reassuring smile. "I'll be grand. Thank you, Jane."

"Um, sure." She said, a little shocked at my impromptu speech.

I grabbed my stuff, kissed Darcy on the cheek, and waved as they drove off into the wild sandy abyss.

* * *

 **DONT SHOOT ME! I AM SO SORRY IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO UPDATE!**

 **Love you guys sooooooo much!**

 **~Blue**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! I finally got my life together and updated, even though I have like 40 papers due...anyone else or is it just me?**

 **Anyways, I want to know what you think of the story and where it should go, just to take into consideration as we go forward.**

* * *

After the dust had settled and the van was out of sight, I hoisted my bag over my shoulder and trudged into the lab. At least the door was unlocked.

I shivered. Did it have to be so damn cold in here? "Stupid, ugh," I muttered, fumbling about blindly for a light switch. Finding none, I gave up, dragging in my sand-coated bags. "Darcy, I love you, but not this much," In true Scottish fashion, I kept swearing loudly and vibrantly the more I tripped over things. It seemed to me that Jane and Erik had emptied out their entire stock of lab supplies onto the floor for me to trip over.

Took me a long time, but I made it back to the bedroom Jane had mentioned. "Thank you, Jesus," I groaned, flopping down onto the bed. I tossed off my hat and boots and changed into my pajamas. Da had been kind enough to let me butcher one of his old kilts into a scarf that proudly displayed our family tartan, so that was carefully hung up. Without even brushing my teeth, I sent Darcy a quick text and before I knew it, darkness had wrapped it's arms around me and I was blissfully asleep.

* * *

When I woke up the next morning, there was someone rummaging around in the dresser next to the bed. Naturally, I sprang bolt upright, clutching the blankets to my chest.

"Relax, it's just me," Jane said. I sank back.

"Mother above, Jane, don't scare me like that!" She smiled apologetically.

"Sorry. Erik's cooking, if you want some." I jumped out of bed.

"Well, why didn't you say so?" She laughed and followed me into the kitchen. What was interesting, though, was that there was one more person in the kitchen than had left last night. "Uh, Jane?"

"Yeah?"

"Am I dreaming or is there a hunk of human perfection standing less than two meters away?"

"Oh, you're not dreaming. He's incredible, isn't he?"

"I agree," I murmured shamelessly, letting my eyes wander over the rises and delves of his muscles. I could only imagine...And the beard! My cheeks were on fire, and then he noticed me and I'm pretty sure they progressed to molten lava. He strode across the room easily, taking my hand in his and bringing it to his lips.

"My lady, I had no idea there was such a gorgeous specimen on Midgard. Had I known, I would have visited years ago." I glanced over at Darcy, who was giving me a very blatant thumbs up.

"Right, I got about half of that, but me likey." Thor looked confused for a moment, then his face lit up.

"My apologies, fair maiden. I am Prince Thor Odinson, of Asgard."

"Apology accepted, my prince," I played along, "My name is Ailis, of Skara Brae." Thor kissed my hand again.

"Should not a maiden such as yourself be clad in Midgard's finest?" I laughed, making a beeline for the coffee.

"I wish. Life has not been so kind, I'm afraid. Thank you Erik." The scientist in question had handed me a full mug of hazelnut coffee. Thor, bless him, looked puzzled.

"Does Midgard not value the beauty of their maidens? Are not the beautiful exalted to high places in the queen's court?" I frowned.

"What'd you do, Darcy, taze him in the forehead?" She grinned at me.

"Nah, just the side, but Jane hit him with the truck."

"I grazed him."

"That's the same lie you told at the hospital."

"Woah, hang on, you had to take him to the hospital?" I butted in, coffee sloshing dangerously.

"Yeah, dude was hammered."

"Darcy, you took him cause he was drunk? Shoulda just brought 'im here! Scots know how to handle drunkards nearly as well as the Irish."

"Shut up, Lissie."

"You shut up."

"You first."

"Nuh-uh, I said it first."

"I'm older."

"Are not!"

"Am too!"

"Ladies, enough, please!" Thor laughed, wrapping his massive biceps around Darcy and I, interrupting our squabble. "I propose we find some sustenance."

"Food? Yes, please." I marched out the door, completely forgetting about my lack of regular clothes. Stopping in the middle of the street, I looked down. "Right. Trousers."

* * *

 **Well, that's chapter three all wrapped up! I'm working on updating TBM, my other story, so if you haven't checked it out, please do so!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! Sorry it's been so long...don't really have a good excuse...  
I super appreciate the fact that you guys are still tagging along with me lol...I know I'm such a hot mess. Anyways, here's chapter 4:**

* * *

It took me a while, but I did manage to find a pair of trousers in my mess of a bag on the floor. They were wrinkled, torn in the knees, and a little coffee stained, but they'd do just fine. It took a fair bit of convincing on Darcy's part, but I changed out of my pajama shirt into a torn AC/DC muscle shirt.

Jane gave Thor a shirt from her ex's stash, which turned out slightly awkwardly when she had to tug a name tag off. Darcy and I snickered as Jane fumbled for an explanation. "She's quite the character, eh, Darce?"

"Oh, yeah. I can't believe I'm only getting a couple'a credits for this." She sighed, rolling her eyes behind her massive glasses.

"Geez, Darce," I groaned, "you need to find something closer to your major."

"Hey, at least I'm in college."

"Hey, at least I don't need college. Don't have to work a day in my life." I quipped proudly. Darcy glared.

"Ok, well at least I'm not a pyro-" I cut her off.

"Don't go there, Darce. Don't cross that line today. I'm not-" I took a breath, "Don't do it." She winced.

"Sorry, Liss. Wasn't thinking." I slung an arm around her, tracing circles on her shoulder with the pad of my thumb.

"I know. I still love you," She grinned at me, and I crossed my eyes at her. We laughed, and everything was forgotten. That's part of why Darce and I always got on so well.

We sat for a while, whispering back and forth in mild amusement as we watched Jane try to herd Thor towards the door. "She's not very good at this, is she?"

Darcy made a face. "Oh, she is _so_ bad at this."

Darcy and I linked arms and chatted aimlessly, watching in great amusement as Jane and Erik herded Thor down the dusty streets of Puente Antiguo to a little cafe. "D'you think they've got anything I like?" I whispered into Darcy's ear.

"Oh, I'll stake your family fortune on it, Miss Picky Eater. This place is the bomb-diggity." I stared at her and the weird little dance she did to finish it off: finger pistols and a few highly unnecessary pelvic thrusts.

"That was horrifying and I want you to promise me to never, ever do it again." She groaned and stuck out her tongue.

"You are absolutely no fun, Lissie." I scoffed and slugged her in the arm.

"No fun? I taught you how to have fun!" Darcy punched me back.

"You absolutely did not! When I met you, you were passed out in a dumpster behind a bar in Queens!"

"After a long-ass night of _fun,_ Lissie."

I snorted. "You're a terrible person and I love you."

We looked over our shoulders to where Jane was attempting to herd Thor in the right direction, like a mouse trying to herd a drunk cat. He looked up and saw me staring, then smiled charmingly and somehow suggestively at the same time. I smirked and added a little sway to my hips as I walked.

Darcy elbowed me, eyes wide, made wider by her glasses. "Are you hitting on the weirdo?"

I shrugged. "What? He's hot and I'm single and _very_ ready to mingle."

"Have fun with that."

"Oh, I will."

* * *

 **IT HAS BEEN OVER A YEAR SINCE I UPDATED I AM SO SORRY**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yeah...so...it's been like** ** _months_** **since I updated LaF, which is 100% my bad. In my defense, I didn't want to dive into the Thor wormhole before I'd seen Ragnarok, and I** ** _just_** **got around to that so...yeah.**

 **Sorry.**

* * *

The five of us were sat round a table in Isabela's Diner (Puente Antiguo's _only_ diner, but who's counting...) watching in various degrees of horror, amusement, and intrigue as Thor decimated a huge helping of steak and eggs - his _third_ helping.

That did not include the five other plates of pancakes, waffles, biscuits and gravy, bacon, and sausages piled up before him. He may have been crazy, but the dude could eat like nothing I'd ever seen before.

Jane, disgustingly bright eyed and bushytailed for this early in the day, pulled out her notebook like a good little scientist and uncapped a pen.

"Thor, now you need to tell us exactly what happened to you last night." In leiu of answering while his mouth was full of eggs, he looked her in the eyes, practically smoldering. She blushed and looked away, so he turned his attentions on me.

I did not blush or look away.

Darcy kicked me. "Ow," I hissed, slapping her arm, but the moment was gone and he was eating again. "Let me be, woman." She just stuck her tongue out at me.

"Ok," Jane tried again, "Maybe start with how you got inside that cloud."

"And how you could eat an entire box of pop-tarts and still be this hungry." I gasped.

"He ate _all_ of them?" Darcy nodded sympathetically, patting my thigh. Jane shot us a withering look as Thor downed a mug of coffee in one massive gulp.

"This drink," he boomed, a happy look in those crazy blue eyes, "I like it!"

Darcy smiled at him. Finally, they had something in common. "Yeah, it's great, isn't it? Isabela makes the best coffee in town."

Instead of agreeing and oh, gee, I dunno, complimenting Isabela or something, our new resident crazy threw his mug to the ground, shattering it into a thousand pieces, crying: "ANOTHER!"

I let out a startled bark of laughter, staring in delighted shock at the chaos unfolding before me.

Poor Isabela Alvarez glared at Thor from behind the counter, glancing angrily at the shattered remains of her mug on the floor. "Sorry, Izzy!" Jane tried to remedy, "Little accident!"

Smoke practically billowing from her ears, poor Isabela turned to a nearby waitress and began venting in fast, ansgry Spanish. " _Did you see that? The first time she brings a man in here and he's a lunatic!"_ Darcy snorted and translated for me, and I hid my glee in my napkin.

Jane rounded on the destructo-saur. "What was that?"

Thor looked confused. "It was delicious. I want another."

"Then you should just say so!" She hissed, noticing the stares he was attracting.

"I just did,"

"I mean ask for it. _Nicely_." Thor frowned.

"I meant no disrespect."

"Alright, then no more smashing. Deal?"

He nodded. "You have my word."

Jane sighed, pushing her hair behind her ears. "Good."

Darcy and I put our heads together, whispering and giggling, doing our best to make Selvig uncomfortable. The little bell over the door put a stop to our fun when a few bedraggled locals dragged themselves in and up to the bar, taking a seat.

Isabela swung by. "Morning, boys."

"The usual, please, Izzy." She smiled and poured them each a cup of coffee.

The other man took a big swig before talking. "You missed all the excitement down at the crater."

Isabela frowned. "What crater?"

Jane and Erik exchanged a look and peered around Darcy to watch the interaction.

"They're saying some kind of satellite crashed in the desert."

"Yeah, we were having a good time with it until the feds showed up and chased us out." Jane stood up.

"Excuse me, did you say there was a satellite crash?"

"Yep. They said it was radioactive. And I had my hands all over it."

Whatever came next was irrelevant, eclipsed by the fact that Thor was beginning to demolish another enormous plate of pancakes. Darcy whipped out her phone.

"Oh my god, this is going on Facebook." I rolled my eyes as she caught Thor's attention. "Smile!"

Mouth full of food, he did as he was told, giving her his best smile. I allowed myself a small smile of my own, watching as the pancakes disappeared.

Erik stood and made his way over to Jane with a question of his own for the locals. "What did the satellite look like?"

The man shrugged, taking another big gulp from his mug. "I don't know nothing about satellites, but it was heavy. Real heavy. Nobody could lift it."

That part caught Thor's attention. He sprang to his feet, grabbed the man by the shoulder, and wheeled him around.

"Where?" He demanded. I stood up, a little nervous.

"Thor, be careful!" He ignored me.

"About 12 miles east of here," The man offered, looking Thor up and down nervously. I can't say I blamed him.

Thor just grinned and strode briskly out of the diner, food long forgotten.

The townsman called after him. "I wouldn't bother! It looked like the whole army was coming in when we left!"

Thor completely disregarded the man and was halfway down the street before any of us thought to pay Isabela or go after him.

* * *

 **It's been forever and a day, I knowwwww**


	6. Chapter 6

**your wish is fulfilled, I managed to muster up more Ailis**

* * *

Darcy and I ran out the door after Thor, leaving Jane and Erik to pay Isabela. For a dude who'd been hit by a truck twice and tazed in the last 12 hours, he was seriously _hauling the mail_.

I huffed and picked up the pace. Darcy crossed her arms over her chest and groaned. "Lis, this isn't going to work."

"What?"

"Boobs."

I nodded, no other explanation necessary. "Got it."

"Go get your man, I'll wait here and Erik and I can hobble after you." I shot her a look and she waved a hand wildly. " _Hurry!_ Do you want Jane to get there first?"

As childish as it was, I still found great pleasure in sticking my tongue out at Darcy before taking off.

"Thor!" He didn't slow. "Thor, slow down! I've got little legs!"

I underestimated Jane though, and she quickly caught up. "Where are you going?"

"To get what belongs to me." Jane scoffed.

"What, so now you own a satellite?" Thor shook his head and gave a little smile, as if correcting a ridiculous child.

"It is not what they say it is." Jane rolled her eyes and grabbed at his arm, shooting me a frustrated look.

"Ailis, would you please give me a hand?" I raised my hands, clearly stating my intent not to get involved. "Thor, whatever it is, the government seems to think it's theirs. Do you intend to just walk in there and take it?"

He paused, fixing her in his gaze. "Yes." Then, "If you take me there now, I'll tell you everything you wish to know."

Darcy grabbed me by the arm, having caught up. "What's happening?"

"I think they're bargaining his information for a lift to the crash site." I hissed back. She nodded and we turned our attention to where Jane was studying him seriously, hands on her meagre hips. " _Everything?"_

Thor nodded. "All the answers you seek will be yours, once I reclaim Mjolnir."

Darcy chose this moment to look around, clearly very lost, and ask, "Myuh-myuh? What's myuh-myuh?"

Jane continued to stare him down, though he looked fairly sincere to me. She even looked like she might even take him up on his offer, but Selvig pulled her aside, making no effort to disguise his dislike for the newcomer. "Jane, please don't do this."

"You know what we saw last night." She shot back, "This can't be a coincidence. I want to know what's in that crater."

Selvig shook his head. "I'm not talking about the crater, I'm talking about _him_." The 'him' was very clearly Thor, who was currently eyeing me without an ounce of subtlety. I raised an eyebrow. He just smirked, those smoldering blue eyes boring into mine. Darcy elbowed me in the side, muttering something about our clothes lighting on fire if we didn't stop staring. The thought made me pale, so I dropped my eyes.

Jane and Selvig were still arguing. "He's promised us answers."

"He's delusional! Listen to what he's saying! ' _Thor', 'Bifrost', 'Mjolnir'_ , these are the stories I grew up with as a child!" He waved his arms wildly to emphasize his point. Jane waved him off noncommittally.

"I'd just be driving him out there, that's all."

Selvig took her shoulders in his hands. "It's dangerous, Jane. _He's_ dangerous."

Jane thought about it for a moment, clearly irritated at the need to decide between knowledge and safety. After a moment, she nodded and walked back over to us. I quickly pretended I hadn't been eavesdropping.

"I'm sorry," she ground out, "I can't take you." Thor was clearly disappointed, but hid it well.

"I understand. Then, this is where we say goodbye." He bent neatly at the waist and kissed the back of her hand.

 _What?_ My mind screamed at me, _Don't let him leave! He's the most gorgeous man you've ever seen, Ailis, and if you let him go, you'll regret it._

"That's..." Jane stuttered, "Thank you," Thor smiled and looked past her.

"Jane Foster, Erik Selvig, Darcy," she perked up and beamed at him, "and Ailis." He paused a moment, letting his eyes linger on my face. I gave a little smile.

"Thor," He took my hand, the pale, stubby little thing dwarfed in his massive paws, and brought it gently to his lips, his eyes never leaving mine. All of a sudden, I felt very warm. He tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear, then nodded sharply.

"Farewell." Then, he turned and meandered off down the dusty street. Erik looked more than relieved. I was conflicted. I hated to see Thor go, but _Lord_ did I love to watch him leave.

Selvig, that pooper of parties, ruiner of good times, and hater of all kinds of fun, clapped a hand onto Jane's shoulder. "Now... let's get back to the lab. We have work to do."

He turned and Darcy followed, tugging at my hand. After a moment of watching Thor in the distance, Jane went after him, but I waited, watching the single most attractive man in the world walk right out of my life without any type of resistance from me.

Damn it, Ailis, why do you always let this happen?

 _You know why_ , that evil little voice in my head hissed. I shook my head, and the little voice faded. But it was right, I knew exactly why I'd let Thor go. I couldn't let him get hurt, like all the others had.

I'd spared him from my curse, but dammit, I felt even worse for it.

* * *

 **Ooh, what kind of curse, Ailis?**


End file.
